Monday, July 6, 2015

"See you in a little while..."

...because it really isn't "goodbye".
My sweet mom went home on June 12th.
We were blessed with nine and a half years with her after her initial diagnosis of Stage IV Ovarian Cancer.  Last November we were given some very bad news about treatment options after all this time.  There really weren't a lot left.  She fought on with chemo and radiation right up until the end.
Her spirit was stronger than her body though and this last round of double-dose chemo was too much and she started developing complications.
Memorial Day weekend she was admitted to the hospital and we really didn't think she would come home.  My sister and I took turns staying nights at the hospital with her to help her get the immediate help she needed during the day or at night.  Oncology floors are busy, busy places.  Sadly.  She asked to have her family from all over the country come and visit those four days.  Thankfully, they did.  Her hospital room was rarely empty.  I'm so glad family from near and far were able to come and spend that time with her.  Her spirits and her blood counts rose and we were told she was well enough to go home and there would be no more treatments.
She chose to pass her last few weeks at home on Hospice.  My sister and I packed out bags and moved into our parents' home to care for her one last time.  It was one of the hardest things I have ever done.  We took shifts caring for her.  Switched our sleep schedules around so we shared the night shift.  Ate whatever people put in front of us, learned to give baths and change sheets with a person in a hospital bed.  How to give her all the medicines she needed.  We held her hand and talked to her when she was agitated or in pain until she quieted down and rested again.
There were times I was so tired, I just wanted to go home.  See my children.  Sleep in my bed.  Take my walks. 
But, I'm so thankful she asked us to do this for her.  What a blessing to look back and have all the memories with her.  Some nights I slept in her bed with her to make sure her oxygen tube stayed in, get her medicines, help her walk to the bathroom or just make sure she didn't try to get up at night by herself.  Listening to her breathing and making sure she had what she needed to be comfortable.  It was like all those times she watched over us as children were coming around full circle and we were watching over her.  Loving her and wanting her to know we were there when she needed us.   
Many of you have read about her treatment here on my blog.  Many, many of you prayed for her.
Thank you.
What an awesome peace to know I will see her again.  Whole.  Healed.  Joyful.


  1. Oh Dee, I sit here with tears rolling down my cheeks as I read of the passing of your sweet mom. I feel devastated for you and your loved ones. Although heartbreaking to watch your mom fight the fight for such a long time with strength and courage, how lovely you and your sister were able to spend the last difficult weeks with her, caring for her, loving her. My heart breaks for you and your family. How joyous that one day you will meet your sweet mom again where sickness and disease is banished forevermore, and you will be able to throw your arms around her once again. Sending you much love and many, many hugs. Kim xxxx

  2. dee i am so sorry to hear about your loss...this was so touching to read it brought me to tears. Just thinking of all a mother does for her kids and how you were able to give that back to her in the end. what peace she must have felt. sending you many hugs

  3. dee i am so sorry to hear about your loss...this was so touching to read it brought me to tears. Just thinking of all a mother does for her kids and how you were able to give that back to her in the end. what peace she must have felt. sending you many hugs

  4. Hugs Dee , i lost mine 10 years ago

  5. As much as you must miss her, I'm so deeply thankful that you gave of yourself to share those last days with your mom AND your sister. You did the right thing, the only thing to do. You touched my heart as you 'painted the picture' of you caring for her, day and night, as she took care of you as a child.

    Peace in Christ.

  6. oh Dee :( hugs and more hugs sweetie. Your mom was beautiful and obviously beautiful on the inside too. Someday I shall meet her!!! what a blessing you two were to your sweet mom!

  7. Prayers for your family Dee. I'm sorry for your loss. It is a blessing to know you will see her again.

  8. Oh, m'gosh~! I just linked to your blog through pinterest to find a photo.
    As I read the story of your dear Mom tears are running down my face.
    I and my Mom kept my dear Daddy at home (with some help from Hospice), as he anticipated his transition to his Eternal Home. He didn't want to leave the home he shared with his sweetheart of 60 yrs. and I was very privileged to help him in that wish. I hold those memories very dear and personal as I think of him every day.
    What a wonderful thing to know that we *know* we will see them again.♥

  9. What a comfort when we have the assurance that we will meet again. God bless you. A quilter in Canada/

  10. Sorry to read of your loss. MOthers are irreplaceable. MUch love

  11. I hope you'll be ready to return soon. I went thru it with my mom having a brain tumor in 2009. It takes a long time to recover. I'm still a WIP.
    You do beautiful work and your fabrics are scrumptious. Please don't deprive the world of the beauty and happiness your work brings.

  12. Hello Dee, I was just thinking about you the other day and reflecting upon your lovely blog and all the the lovely makes you imagined. I hope all is well with you. Xx

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